Saturday, 26 December 2009

i die one of many

Here is the most extraordinary tribute to a very special musician and songwriter, Vic Chesnutt. I adore Vic's music

Reading Kristin's words on Christmas Day, that “This time, it’s real scary: *this* time, he left a note, *this* time, he asked them to call me” completely slayed me...

don't count my scars like tree rings

Thursday, 17 December 2009

jenny slate i'm starting to think you're awesome!

Obvious Child from Gillian Robespierre on Vimeo.

i hexed him, now he's losing his hair

Contentious, yet I happen to agree: Why Courtney Love was Kurt Cobain's Lyrical Equal

Oh, and I remember hovering at my TV when that Jools Holland episode was first aired, ready to press 'record' :) And that video of 'Jennifer's Body' made goosebumps curse through my entire body.

"He keeps you in a box by the bed/ Alive but just barely/ He said 'I'm your lover, I'm your friend/ I'm purity, hit me again'".

Wednesday, 16 December 2009

get yr cray-on

From my inbox...


Get Yr Cray-On!!! (Please forward widely)

***Call-out for submissions to the Bay Area Childcare Collective Radical Coloring Book!!!***

That’s right- the Bay Area Childcare Collective is putting together a coloring book to use as both a fun and radical teaching tool as well as a fundraiser, and we want your help! For more info on the Childcare Collective, go to www.bayareachildcarecollective.net/about/

We are looking for some folks to illustrate one or more pictures each with radical themes. Many of the kids using the book have parents or other loved ones already involved in community organizing (especially labor, immigration and housing rights) so we want the book to help explain why this kind of work is great and important.

What we want:

- simple black and white line drawings that will look good when photocopied

- pictures with lots of blank space so they’re fun to color

- appropriate for very young children while still (if possible) appealing to older kids and adults (witty allusions encouraged)

- each picture should include a caption or leave space for a caption that will explain what the picture is about (ex: “everyone in the community helped fight the eviction”)

- please leave a margin of AT LEAST 1” on all sides so it is easy to photocopy!

- be creative! Feel free to use animals, shapes, plants, sea creatures to tell yr story- we want it to be fun and inspire kids’ imaginations.

When you know what you’re going to draw, please email us to let us know so we can avoid repeats and/or complement your artwork with like-minded pieces.

We would LOVE your ideas and suggestions.

We want this book to be a celebration of women of color led organizing!



Some specific ideas that we’ve already come up with include:

* * * POWER/ Just Cause Oakland/ Women’s Collective of the Day Laborer’s Union (the awesome orgs we provide childcare for!)

* * * Dolores Huerta/ Cesar Chavez/ Farm Labor movement

* * * Domestic Workers Movement

* * * Radical labor organizing

* * * Housing rights- fighting evictions, affordable housing, healthy neighborhoods

* * * Food justice (examples: People's Grocery, Rooftop gardens, people's gardens)

* * * Gender diversity, queer visibility

* * * Feminism; Women leaders in bay area movement organizing; Mothers & Parents in the movement

* * * Anti-War resistance & Anti-Imperialism

* * * Environmentalism, water, climate change, caring for the earth

* * * Indigenous resistance, organizing, AIM, EZLN, Alcatraz takeover

* * * Black Panthers/ Young Lords/ & history of liberation movements in the Bay Area

* * * Abolishment of/ work around the Prison Industrial Complex



We might decide to organize the pictures into various sections or themes, like cooperation, solidarity, equality, sharing, negotiation, etc. (TBD)

Also, we want the finished product to be bilingual (English and Spanish), so if you have translation skills, please share them with us!

***DEADLINE FOR COMPLETED DRAWINGS: JANUARY 15th, 2010…sharp!***

Submissions can either be scanned and emailed (high quality- 300 dpi or better) to RadColoringBook@gmail.com OR you can send it via Snail Mail (though we won’t give it back to you so bear that in mind) to Get Yr Cray-On! c/o Pike, 1884 Market St, SF, CA 94102.

We can’t wait to see what you come up with!

In love and Solidarity,

The Cray-On Crew.

Sunday, 13 December 2009

kinda silly but it put a happy smile on my face!

All Star Baseball 2000 - "Since You've Been Gone" movie challenge from Cob Job on Vimeo.



By Paul Baribeau and Eric Ayotte

we heart art


We Heart Arts is a pretty rad project...

We Heart Arts is a non-profit organization that works to raise funds for children's creative arts programs around the world. We are trying to build a creative future for children via the goodwill of humanity and through creative means.

We Heart Arts believe that;
i. Creative arts teaches young people the value of lifelong active personal expressionism
ii. Creative arts teaches young people to question the world they live in
iii. Creative arts teaches young people that thinking outside of the box is an important mental function in life
iv. Creative arts teaches young people to engage in a social network of proactive young people invested in a community built on meaningful, sustained ideas and expressionism
v. Creative arts opens up a world of opportunities for young people to grow and help others through arts therapy
vi. Creative arts can open up an avenue of communication for children with learning difficulties
vii. Creative arts can help children process and work through traumatic experiences
viii. Creative arts can provide peer interaction and a sense of community, independence and feelings of control


(Thanks to Megan's myspace post for making me aware of this project)

Friday, 11 December 2009

not chicks


Jacinta and Julie's excellent book, 'Girls Are Not Chicks' (PM Press/Reach and Teach) is going to be reviewed on Newsnight Review tonight in the UK
Eek!!

www.girlsnotchicks.com

If you catch the show, post your thoughts of the TV review/discussion here and I'll pass it all on to Jacinta and Julie in case they can't watch the show from the US...

Wednesday, 9 December 2009

hammer on

Hammer On Press, is a new UK based feminist publishing house, focussed on Publishing, Workshops, and Social Change; breaking down boundaries between academia, art and popular culture.

I'm excited to hear how everything at Hammer On Press develops as there's so much exciting potential!

we understand the felt presence of experiences

I wish I could be this articulate everytime I'm asked why I self-publish, and why I think making our own culture and cultural contributions is important.
I think it's an undeniable answer to the question of why art is activism.



(thanks to John Carling for his link to this video)

Monday, 7 December 2009

impulsive random platform

From my inbox...


Dear Self-Publisher,

I am writing on behalf of London based art publication, "Impulsive Random Platform", of which I am co-founder and editor. I would like to bring to your attention our latest call for submissions/ collaboration and to personally invite you to apply for inclusion in our 12th issue, which will be made up of work by self published, small press zine and magazine makers with a launch event and opportunity to sell previous issues of included publications in a London venue in spring 2010. Please find below our call for submissions and do not hesitate to contact me if you have any further questions.

I look for forward to hearing from you and keep up the good work!

Alex of IRP


For our 12th issue of IRP, we are seeking submissions and expressions of interest solely from creators of self-published, small press zines and magazines.

The aim of this issue is to create a snapshot of current independent and alternative self-publishing from creative individuals and groups in Europe and the US (although submissions from applicants outside of these areas are also welcome) and to create a dialogue between like-minded projects and makers.

We would like submissions to consist of new and un-published work made specifically for this issue, which is representative of participants’ publications. This could be a collaboration between the creators of a zine and/or the work of a selected artist and regular contributor. While the purpose of the content of this issue is to promote and advertise the activity of a selection of publications, we want applicants to be creative with their submissions- we do not want to create a magazine full of adverts! Similarly, we would like the content to be appropriate to and a logical progression of the work regularly featured in issues of IRP and so for this reason, we ask applicants to not submit articles and/or reviews of events, etc., however images and combinations of images and text, text art, poems, concrete poetry and creative writing are all perfectly acceptable. For examples of previous content of IRP, please visit our website: www.impulsiverandomplatform.com.

We intend to use our regular method of display for this issue- an A5 black and white photocopied magazine, however we are happy to receive submissions and proposals for work outside of this format, such as colour images and hand-rendered pages. Due to the nature of the project and for the issue to reach as wide an audience as possible, we are also planning on making a larger edition number than usual (our edition sizes tend to range from 50 to 100 copies per issue) so please keep this in mind if your submission has any specialist requirements.

To celebrate the launch of this issue, we are hoping to host an event in a London venue in spring 2010, where the issue will be sold (all money made from the sale of IRP12 will be used to cover the cost of production and the event), refreshments served, and previous issues and work by participants will also be available to buy via a communal selling table. Following the launch, the issue will be available to buy from our regular stockists and forthcoming online shop. In return for their participation, all contributors will receive one complimentary copy of the magazine for their archive and are also welcome to distribute the zine via their usual stockists and avenues of sale.

To submit, please send images, and combinations of image and text as 300 dpi jpegs to irpsubmissions@gmail.com. For text, please send your submissions as word documents to the same address. In addition, please also include a brief bio of your zine and a copy of your publication’s logo, if applicable. This additional information will not be considered during the judging process and will only be used to provide a back story for selected publications within the issue and for advertising purposes. The deadline for submissions is 5pm on Monday 21st December 2009, however please do not hesitate to get in touch ASAP with any questions you may have regarding the publication.

We look forward to hearing from you.

IRP

www.impulsiverandomplatform.com

glutton for fatshion

From my inbox...

Glutton for Fatshion is super proud and excited to release the CALL FOR SUBMISSIONS for our second issue to be released in early February, 2010.

Glutton for Fatshion: For ferocious, lush, fatties who can never get enough! Glutton is about treating yourself well and getting what you want in a way that doesn't fuck with anyone's justice, revolution, or freedom. Glutton doesn't just talk about size acceptance, it is about living in a way that slams open boundaries (with your hips) and tears apart mainstream ideas of beauty and health (with your teeth). Glutton isn't just about plus size fashion. Glutton is about fat style, anti-classist consumerism, making shit yourself, loving how you look, telling your community that they are fly. This is a wholly fat-positive/glorifying, trans-inclusive, anti-racist/poc centered, anti-class-ist, acknowledging our privilege type of shebang. And, of course, really fun and ferocious.



Themes:
This issue we are focusing on hot hot sex, righteous self-love, and big fat relationships.

A list of ideas for articles, art, well-articulated rants, poetry and otherwise:

Radical Fatshion (as always)
Radical Self Love
Fat Sex Advice on Positions/Toys/Negotiating/Consent
Fat Experiences getting tested for STIs/Pregnancy
Fat Experiences with casual sex or sex parties
Fat Experiences in open/poly/radical love/threesome relationships etc.
Fat Experiences buying/wearing/liking lingeries and sexy underthings
Fat Positive Valentines
Fat Erotic Photos
Fat Dating Advice/reviews of online dating sites
Dressing as masturbation
Lingerie Paperdolls (We especially would like to see a doll that is a size 26+)
Fat Fantasies/Porn
Reviews of independent and radical fatshion stores and designers
Upcoming NYC spring events for radical fatties and our friends


Issue title TBD, if you have witty suggestions, let us know!


SUBMISSIONS MUST BE PRINT-READY, please copy edit or ask a friend to!
Our zine is folded, regular letter-sized paper, which means that your entries should be no larger than 4 in. x 5.5 in. per page.
All submissions must be received by January 22, 2009 by midnight
Please e-mail to glutton4zine@gmail.com in either word or pdf format
We will let you know if your piece was accepted or sweetly declined. (and an explanation, if you wish)

You can also request the first issue by e-mailing us! $2-5 donation, please to cover printing and shipping costs.

If you have access to cheap (free) corporate printing opportunities, or would like to help us select submissions, promote our launch party, assist with layout, create filler art etc. etc. please let us know!

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=107809972565

twtee





Check out Emma Thatcher and Eva Megias's fabulous Twtee homo tshirt project...


using the classic white shape as a cañvas we share our thoughts and feelings about the weather, politics, beliefs, animals, office jobs, sexuality, heroes and cross contiñental shifts (!!!).

we wanted to make somethiñg using our hands and the material world, this way we hope to recoñnect to childhood energy, remembering carnivals and parties, play acting,performañce, wonder and making our own costumes (?!?!).

we put our ideas on a big fabulous white space.






Thanks to Debi for making me aware of this project!

Sunday, 6 December 2009

sister spit in the uk, november 2010

From my inbox...

Hey all,

So, on the success of the last Sister Spit UK tour, RADAR Productions; the US based not-for-profit arts publishing company are funding it for another year!

Sister Spit: The Next Generation is coming back to the UK in NOVEMBER 2010.

At this stage, Michelle Tea is contacting a whole line-up of new readers and performers and we will keep you all up to date with any developments. Please let me know through this email address if you would like to register your interest in running a show in your city or town or a part of your festival!

We are especially looking for interest from Universities/Colleges and Festivals as to secure an international arts grant that will help cover a lot of the costs, RADAR Productions is looking desperately for letters from such institutions agreeing to a show in the timeframe of November 2010. Nothing has to be set in stone, it's simply a register of interest or an official invite to bring them back here. If you could help us out with one of these letters, PLEASE email me back asap and I'll let you know what you'll need to include! They need them by January 1st!!

That's all for now, i hope you're all as excited as we are!!!
Em and Emily (Tour Bookers/Managers)
x
lolaandthecartwheelssheff@hotmail.co.uk

- - -

WHAT IS SISTER SPIT?
Sister Spit, the awesome lit/spoken word/performance troupe based in the USA, led by celebrated author Michelle Tea of 'Rent Girl' and 'Without a Net' fame is coming over to the UK in November 2010 with a whole new line-up of celebrated queer/grrrl artists, writers, zinesters and performers.

Michelle says: 'I write books, and host readings for other people who write books, to be listened to by people who like reading books. My last novel is called Rose of No Man's Land and is about a teenage genderqueer loner who gets mixed up with a speed freak mall rat and falls in love. Or something. My last anthology is called It's So You and it's full of essays by stylish people about how they came to look so great, such as Eileen Myles, Kim Gordon, Jenny Shimizu, Kate Bornstein, Ali Liebegott, Tara Jepsen, Beth Lisick and other modern role models. I run the Radar Reading + Salon series in San Francisco, and every so often pile a bunch of bitches in a van and set off across the country under the guise of Sister Spit: The Next Generation.'

Previous travellers on the Sister Spit tour include: Michelle Tea, Beth Lisick, Ariel Schrag, Sara Seinberg, Kirya Traber, Ben McCoy, Cristy C. Road, Rhiannon Argo, Kat Marie Yoas, Amos Mac, Tara Jepsen, Nicole J Georges, Sini Anderson, Lynnee Breedlove, Silas Howard, Kirk Read, Chelsea Starr, Ali Liebegott and many many more...!!!

Find More Info Here:

http://www.radarproductions.org/sisterspit.html (OFFICIAL SITE)
http://www.myspace.com/sisterspitnextgen
http://www.facebook.com/SisterSpit

Friday, 4 December 2009

qzap:meta #3

From my inbox...


Call For Submissions - QZAP:meta #3

We are seeking articles and artwork depicting and discussing specifically queer zines.

Articles should be between 500-1000 words. They can be on any of the following themes:

Queer zines and community

Collecting queer zines

Queer zine history

Your relation to queer zines

Why you put out your zine

The first queer zine you read or were influenced by

The future of queer zines and queer zine community


Artwork and images (photos, illustrations, etc.) should be print-ready at 300 dpi or higher. Black and white preferred. Artwork should be submitted as either TIFF or PDF files.

Submissions can be sent to milo[at]qzap.org with the subject "For QZAP:meta #3"

Deadline for submissions: January 15, 2010. Anticipated publication date: February, 2010

Tuesday, 1 December 2009

grizzly sleeper

I spend a good 80% of my life asleep or snoozing. I wish santa would bring me this grizzly bear bean bag for christmas so that we could snuggle!!



Buy here: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=34208794

realisation, recognition, and clarity

Charlotte Cooper wrote this on her facebook today and it made goosebumps curse up and down my body with recognition and understanding...

I wish there was a word that means something like "compassion and gratitude for your younger self and relief that things turned out okay even though they were really hard at the time," or "momentary realisation of how the pieces of your life fit together," or "the clarity of recognising a pivotal moment, and the resolve that recognition engenders," or "amazement that things from the ancient past have some kind of impact on people you know in the present in a way you could never have predicted". Something like that.

Thursday, 19 November 2009

eleven heavy things at the venice biennale



I'm a bit behind on this, but it's worth posting anyways...



Eleven Heavy Things, created for the 53rd International Art Exhibition at the Venice Biennale, is comprised of eleven sculptural works installed in an enclosed garden within Giardino delle Vergini. The cast fiber-glass, steel-lined pieces are designed for interaction: pedestals to stand on, tablets with holes for body parts, and free-standing abstract headdresses. A series of three pedestals in ascending height, The Guilty One, The Guiltier One, The Guiltiest One, ask the viewer to ascribe their guilt relative to the people around them. A large flat shape, hand-painted with Burberry plaid, hovers on a pole, waiting to become someone’s aura. A series of tablets invite heads, arms, legs and one finger: This is not the first hole my finger has been in, nor will it be the last. A wider pedestal for two people to hug on reads, We don!t know each other, we’re just hugging for the picture….
July assumes and invites the picture — these are eleven photo opportunities, in a city where one is always clutching a camera. Though the work begins as sculpture, it becomes a performance that is only complete when these tourist photos are uploaded onto personal blogs and sent in emails — at which point the audience changes, and the subject clearly becomes the participants, revealing themselves through the work.

Production of this work has been supported by Deitch Projects.

By Miranda July

wishing I had $550 to spare...

... For THIS!!

I *heart* Marion Peck

Saturday, 14 November 2009

Friday, 13 November 2009

'underground'

I was recently asked to answer some questions for a friends' PhD research. After spending hours on answering the questions I just saw this blog post by Tobi Vail that - along with input from Jean Smith - has just summed up everything I was cack-handedly trying to say and get at. I love the brainpower behind these words.

how do we change this, how do we bring "the punk politics" back or update it for the present/future? What would that entail exactly? What is our political platform? What needs to happen? What tools do we have available? What do we want to change? How can things be improved?

secret powers

How I discovered my Secret Powers (an essay in several parts)
by Keri Smith


This just blew my tiny mind! I love the way Keri attacks and approaches the world. I heart her!

Monday, 9 November 2009

my mouth your ear

From my inbox...

My Mouth Your Ear needs YOU!

New queer spoken word event in London.

We are looking for queer/lgbt folk who write, be it stories, poetry, performance, rants, zine articles, blogs, fact, fiction, anything you can use your mouth and a mic for. We are interested in hearing from you whether you have done a hundred gigs or have never shown your writing to anyone. We also invite you to bring pieces of writing by others which you have found particularly inspiring and would like to read out at the event, again in any format.

We are hoping to hold the first My Mouth Your Ear on December 13th. If you are interested in performing or reading at My Mouth Your Ear please email us with a sample of writing, preferably something you would like to read at the event. Or email us for more info.

We look forward to hearing from you!

My Mouth Your Ear
mymouthyourear@googlemail.com


:UPDATE:

MY MOUTH YOUR EAR – an afternoon of queer spoken word.
3pm – 8pm, Sunday 13th December
Lift n Hoist, 1 Queen’s Row, Camberwell, London

My Mouth Your Ear is a queer spoken word afternoon where performers and writers share stories, poetry, performances, raps, rants, zine articles, blogs, fact, fiction and generally anything you can use your mouth and a mic for.

suggested donation of £1- 3

Performances, mulled wine, cake.

Performing on 13th December:

YALINIDREAM. Lankan Blood, Manchester Born, Texas bred and Brooklyn steeped, YaliniDream is a Queer Sri Lankan Tamil raised in outside lands. She conjures spirit through her unique blend of poetry, theater, song, and dance. Check out her work on www.myspace.com/yalinidream
CHARLOTTE COOPER. I've been making, publishing and performing things for donkeys years, but I've been getting into trouble for quite a bit longer. Some of this is explained at www.charlottecooper.net
HEENA PATEL (Manchester). Recovering ex-optimist. Dog-fancier. Hates wet feet. Avid Red Dwarf fan. 29, still not out.
JAY BERNARD. Currently 'editor' of Dissocia Zine, which combines dry wit, post-irony and non-existence. She is author of Your Sign is Cuckoo, Girl (2008), and was recently poet in residence on two allotments in Oxford and London, and at the Benenden School in Kent. Jay has performed at venues such as Buckingham Palace, LadyFest and Croydon library. She blogs at brrnrrd.wordpress.com.
SWITHUN COOPER. Swithun's poetry has appeared in magazines including Time Out, Magma, Chroma and Poetry London, and the anthology City State: New London Poetry. This year he won an Eric Gregory Award from the Society of Authors.
FOX. Founder of SALUTE! Design and CubCulture screen-printing, Fox is a creative who also enjoys rapping and dancing and having many fingers in many pies.
LEN LUKOWSKA. Sometimes a writer, sometimes a performer. Generally an undisciplined faggy layabout who works in a library and needs more sleep.
CHARLOTTE RICHARDSON (Wears the Trousers magazine, more info to follow!)
Compere KAT REDSTONE

NB we don’t have a running order yet, performances will be throughout the afternoon/eve.

If you are interested in performing or reading at My Mouth Your Ear please email us with a sample of writing, preferably something you would like to read at the event. We’d love to hear from you whether you have done a hundred gigs or have never shown your writing to anyone. We also invite you to bring pieces of writing by others which you have found particularly inspiring and would like to read out at the event, again in any format.

Facebook event: http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=201698148453&ref=mf

Friday, 6 November 2009

the mattress

THE MATTRESS (performance at the FIAF in partnership with the WHITNEY MUSEUM)



Whitney Live, in collaboration with French Institute Alliance Française, presents one young composer in dialogue with pioneering filmmaker Alice Guy Blaché as part of the Whitney Museum retrospective of her career.Like Alice Guy Blaché, Tender Forever (aka Melanie Valera) was born and began her artistic life in France. She continues to live an intercontinental existence, artistically and otherwise, and moves between the streets of Bordeaux where she grew up and her adopted home town of Portland, Oregon. Her tender, delicate songs bring forth hidden connections between these worlds and occupy the musical landscape in which Melanie Valera became Tender Forever (taking as reference points punk rock, experimental electronica, weird visuals, and collaborations with several fellow K Records artists)

Tuesday, 3 November 2009

canadian queer zine art show on-line

From my inbox...



http://www.flickr.com/photos/92537785@N00/sets/72157622390914792/

If you missed the first showing of SPEW Fo(u)rth: A Canadian Queer Zine Art Show at Venus Envy in Halifax, Nova Scotia, go to the link above to see documentary photos.


SPEW Fo(u)rth is a wheat paste poster art show of highlights from the twenty five year history of Canadian queer zines. QZAP's co-founder, Christopher Wilde, created the posters during an Artist in Residency at Anchor Zine Library and Archive in Halifax in September 2009.


This poster show will be available for touring Canada in 2010, locations and dates to be determined, although tentative plans include events in Edmonton, Toronto, Ottawa, and Montréal. Please contact Christopher Wilde at QZAP if you are interested in bringing SPEW Fo(u)rth to your city.

Monday, 26 October 2009

you bowl me over & i'm not that drunk

It's no secret that I adore Lilli Carre (my giddiness at seeing her window display at Little Otsu in SanFran this Summer goes to show!), but **just look** at this amazing moving illustration, 'Boogie Women' care of Lilli's blog!!!!!!!!

radical arts



The second issue of ArtXX: A Radical Arts Magazine is out now.
This issue is chock full of mind blowing talent, fierce politics, and endless creativity. Featuring interviews with: G.B Jones, Mary Coble, Monica Majoli, Orly Cogan, Mia Nakano and more, more, more... plus stories by: Eileen Myles, Meliza Banales, Rhiannon Argo, Ill Nippashi.
More info, plus info on how to get hold of a copy, or read parts online, see here.

The GB Jones interview is by yours truly, and is a bit of an inspiration fest, as GB blows my mind. Actually, she's just joined Myspace too, if you wanna be her friend...

Everybody involved with Art XX blows my mind, actually. A terrific set of queers who I was real lucky to hang out with this summer. I have so much love for them, and this magazine xox

Friday, 16 October 2009

leeds on saturday

Sapphic Traffic, Saturday 17th Oct, at The Common Place, Leeds brings these treats:

6pm RISE ABOVE: The Tribe 8 Documentary
The Tribe 8 Documentary looks at the life and times of legendary San Francisco Dyke-Punk band Tribe 8.

7.45pm Lynnee Breedlove: Confessions Of A Poser
Breedlove, ex-Tribe 8 singer/lyricist, 1990-2005. Confessions of a Poser is a comic look at men’s bodies, the mystery of the purple dick, lesbian legacies and how to use them, family, the impossibility of manhood, fatherhood, butch heroes, and the evil drive to feminize.

9pm till late Sapphic Traffic Disco

W/Ste McCabe 'Murder Music' Album launch.
Ste joins us from Manchester to hypnotize us with his blend punk rock riffs, pop melodies, dated beats, noisy electro and working class lefty queerness. If that doesn't get you in the mood. You're fucked.

- - -

Fun&Frollics indeed! I'm also going to be taking the zine distro. Me and Emily have decided to re-name and re-launch the distro under a new name (no longer the 'Manifesta Distro', since, in Emily's words the name "no longer seems accurate, as [the distro] has been running independantly from the collective for a number of years, and the Manifesta collective itself no longs seems particularly active") We're going to look at taking new zines and use our zine energies to make a queer/feminst distro as we want it to be, rather than keeping it as what it has always been, or what we felt it should have been. More news on this soon!

somethings are best left never said

In 1989 I wanted nothing more than to be [and look like] Wendy James (of Transvision Vamp), or to be a member of Fuzzbox.

Twenty bleedin' years ago. Ugh.

Vix of Fuzzbox was on the Never Mind The Buzzcocks TV show this week, and it brought it all rushing back...






I'll fess up tho, and say that I was too young (in 1986) to have loved my favourite Fuzzbox song at the time of its release; shame, cuz it's the one I play most often now...


I never did manage to nail the Wendy James look tho (as photos of me from that era will confirm!)... she was a hard act to follow!

photo that makes me smile wide


My pal Sara Hansson wearing a brilliant tshirt by Nanna Johnsson, made for Bang - a really well established swedish feminist magazine that highlights socio-political feminisms, new perspectives, and feminist voices.

I heart this shirt so much!

Monday, 12 October 2009

australian comics and zines...

From my inbox...


From: Ghostpatrol

A NEW PROJECT
I’ve recently been asked by a lovely publisher to compile a collection of australian based comics, zines and narrative based drawings. Work can be either colour or black and white and in A4 portrait format of single or multiple pages. If you have any suitable work or know anyone who would like to contribute, please send low res images or questions to: david@ghostpatrol.net I’ll require submissions by the 10th of November.

Friday, 9 October 2009

struck with envy?

From my inbox...

Have you ever been struck with envy?
You know, the things that make you wonder about your own capabilities as an artist. How DOES she does that?
How does he manage to capture the emotion so well in his painting?
Oh wow, I wish I could draw something like that.


Well I do. I've always wanted to make art that was edgy and raw. Somehow I could never translate that into my work. I end up with cutesy characters and sunshine-y elements that somehow crept into the fold. So I would get jealous when I see a work that I wished I could make – if only I could force my hand to move that way!
So I'd like to invite you to share your thoughts on the topic for issue #6 of the Good to Know zine:

----------------------------------------------------
Do you get jealous/envious when you view other people’s work? Does it make you a better artist? How do you get over it?
----------------------------------------------------

To participate:
1. Just e-mail with your response (mailinglist@pikaland.com); and also
2. Add in your name + link to your blog/portfolio/shop

And if you'd like to send in images to go along with your entry, that would be awesome! Here is a quick guideline:
1. The image should be in black and white, (dark grey is acceptable as well) - colors won't show up well, so you can tweak your image to make it B&W.
2. Image must be at least 200 dpi for clarity, and be at least 1000 pixels wide.

I can't wait to see what you have to say about this topic, so please send in your answers by Friday, 16th October to be a part of the issue!

All participants will get a free download of the PDF of the issue.(Psst, participants can also purchase the zine for keeps at a special price!)

http://pikaland.com/goodtoknow

Hope you're having a lovely Friday! Warmest,Amy

you know it breaks my heart in half when i see them trying to fly







Thursday, 8 October 2009

a cathartic rush

Alas, I can't make this show, but having put Evangelista on in Leeds last year I know that this is a gig not to be missed, and I'm a fool for having other plans. Carla is the real deal.

From my inbox...

Evangelista w/ Carla Bozulich
Jasmina Maschina
Operations
Levenshulme Bicycle Orchestra
Sunday Oct 11th at Islington Mill, Manchester
7:30pm
£6 adv (from Piccadilly Records, wegottickets.com)

As one of only 3 UK shows in support of the launch of her new album, The Prince Of Truth, released October 5 on Constellation, we are super megaexcited to have this show here at the Mill.

"Rife with suspense, drama, and a grisly cast of characters, Voyager's probably more likely to ignite your inner playwright than get your foot tapping, but it's still a cathartic rush all the same." - Pitchfork

Carla Bozulich is best known as the singer from LA-based band Gerladine Fibbers and as the woman who re-made Willie Nelson’s Red Headed Stranger – with Willie Nelson as a special guest. Carla has one of the most unique voices in any genre. Her work is at once brutally raw and weirdly visionary.
Born in New York City, she sang in a couple of groups – the Neon Veins and Invisible Chains, the latter of which recorded an album for The Minutemen’s New Alliance label when Carla was 18 years old. In 2001 she scored a Los Angeles production of Jean Genet’s The Maids, and the award-winning feature film By Hook Or By Crook, which she scored and for which she compiled the soundtrack, went to Sundance in 2003. That same year saw the release of Carla’s new rendition of Willie Nelson’s Red Headed Stranger. She has also explored mixed media and performance art, including a commission for The Getty Museum in Los Angeles.

*****

Support for the evening comes in mighty impressive shape of

Jasmina Maschina - 'Superb debut album of beautiful folk guitar music from Berlin-based Maschina. This is straight-ahead folk filtered through an imaginative electro-prism that knocks Cat Power into a cocked hat.'

Operations (Chris Anderson) is a Manchester based conceptual music producer and sound artist. He performs and records with an array of analog synths and effects, reel-to-reel tape and cassette players, and guitars. He has self-released a number of EPs and has records out on the independent DIY label Dead Pilot Record

Levenshulme Bicycle Orchestra - From Levenshulme. They use parts of bikes. They also happen to be one of the most intriguing and ambitious acts currently around in Manchester.

EVANGELISTA- http://www.myspace.com/evangelistasounds
JASMINA MASCHINA - http://www.myspace.com/jasminemaschine
OPERATIONS - http://www.myspace.com/operationsoperations
LEVENSHULME BICYCLE ORCHESTRA- http://www.myspace.com/levenshulmebicycleorchestra www.islingtonmill.com/events

fork in hell

1000 Awesome Things by Monsieur Cabinet cheered me up a tiny bit today; especially #s 720, 780, and 858 - the other side of the pillow is my favourite side too!!

Other than that, this week has been spectacular in its ability to crush me.
Ha - the lyrics to the song I'm listening to as I type just said "push me to the edge and I just might jump over". Quite.

Tuesday, 6 October 2009

bedazzling eye candy

If I were to have an 'image of the day' style blog, these two from/of Argentinian artist Irana Douer would win for today...




Bottom image is entitled: 'Strange Face'

Monday, 5 October 2009

reinspired to spread the love and encouragement





All of the above have made me wanna start up my toilet sticker crusade again! Public bathrooms beware; positive thoughts are coming your way! (this city sure seems to need it at the moment)

Top: I heart Your Bike by heroes and criminals
Middle: the You Are Beautiful sticker project
Bottom: the I Love You cards project

Thursday, 1 October 2009

pouting, sulky girls


One of my favourite artists, Miss Van is currently exhibiting in London, until 28th October and I haven't got a hope in hell of making it down this month. Bit grumpy bout this...

[image is from the StolenSpace website, taken on the opening night]

self-described lesbian feminist with punk sensibilities and a solid grounding in queer activism

Eek! Super rad article on k8 Hardy from the New York Times.

zines online

Red Chidgey has done an amazing job of making all issues of Reassess Your Weapons zine available electronically online. They're now archived as part of Grassroots Feminism.net

You can look inside ten issues of Reassess Your Weapons, here. The only issue that's missing is issue six, as neither of us had a copy of that issue, bizzarrely!

Red has also archived a zine I wrote in 2003/4-ish. The zine adapted my Masters research thesis, entitled '"I'm not waiting'. Doing it yrself, now: Challenging constructions of feminist activism and aesthetics in women's punk music communities" into zine format. (Thesis now held at the Centre for Women's Studies, University of York, England). With the zine, I wished to engage the activist community in which I am part, with the academic community in which my research was part of, and bring the two together in discussion of contemporary feminist activism.
The zine (which you can read here) seems really quite outdated to me, reading it back now. But I guess it's still worthwhile documenting such creativity, female production, independent media, and forms of our research.


Incidently, issue #10 of Reassess Your weapons is still available to buy. See my etsy site, or hit the paypal button on COTL myspace to buy a copy for £2 postage paid in the UK.

Wednesday, 30 September 2009

holy cow, this weekend is hot

This weekend, if you can't go to the Brighton thing below, and Team Gina at the Brudenell in Leeds ain't your bag, then go to this and make me jealous:

The Fat of the Land is a queer chub Harvest Festival that will take place on 3 October 2009, 2-6pm at St Anne's, Dean Street, London.
Seriously, this event is gonna kick total ass... and is in some respects like a blast for the past for me, as BJ is gonna be there; I remember writing about BJ in a women's studies MA assessed paper (on lesbian/queer beauty pageants) way back in 2002 - I was kinda obsessed at the time. Plus, Allyson Mitchell is gonna be showing art work there too (swoon). I curse being up North sometimes. Bring me back stories and jam if you go!

brighton on sunday

Sunday, 27 September 2009

Jessica is inside my head, I'm sure of it...

Jessica Hopper 27/9/09:

FORCE FEILD OR FIELD
I think today might be the first time I have felt normal in a month. It feels momentous. Or maybe it's more like 10 weeks? After one thing passes, I think "oh after this, then things will be "normal" but there keeps being an AND THEN lately. I know it's a myth, that the "and then" is stoppable--it's all AND THEN. When I was about 25, I had this idea that if I did certain things perfect, or got my life "arranged" it would become slower and predictable and manageable and then there wouldn't be some much AND THEN AND THEN and I could be on a peaceful mountaintop of life and just spend my time painting pictures of dogs or catching up on old New Yorkers and no one would die or move away or be sick or I would have money and no one would be on crack or mad at me. I thought you could do things to prevent the AND THEN barrage.

Friday, 18 September 2009

good to know

I was lucky enough to contribute bits from Colouring Outside The Lines zine issues 1-5 to this zine project, created by the incredibly awesome and inspiring Amy of Pikaland, one of my favourite blogs (in fact, to call it just a 'blog' is selling it waaay short). Amy is so great at bringing creative folks together and forging links, networks, and communities - this new zine project of hers in particular is full of advice and inspiration, and I'm so pleased it exists...



We just launched the FIFTH issue of Good to Know zine, and it's our heaviest copy yet: 68 pages filled with advice + inspiration from artists about the topic of art education:
"Do you think that artists need to have degrees/qualifications from art school in order to be one? Did you study art? Does it matter?"

You can purchase the issue in PDF or hardcopy (and find out more info about the zine) directly from here
For subscriptions – PDF or a physical copies – you can head to our Etsy shop
yay!

Thursday, 17 September 2009

sometimes when writing is really great i feel a little bit MORE

MBS makes me feel like this.

Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore on Close to the Knives...

In the early ’90s, everyone was dying—that’s how it felt, it felt like everyone was dying. We were the first generation of queers to grow up knowing that desire meant AIDS meant death, and so it made sense that when we got away from the other death—the one that meant marriage, house in the suburbs, a lifetime of brutality, both interior and exterior, and call this success or keep trying, keep trying for more brutality—it made sense that everyone was dying, because we had only known death.

Queer heroes were dykes, or they were dying—some of the dykes were dying too, but not as fast, unless it was suicide or a cancer they hadn’t mentioned, cancer like childhood sometimes you can’t say it. So when I found David Wojnarowicz, he was already dead; I didn’t find him, I found his words.

Close to the Knives: This was the first time I’d ever read something and thought: me. That rage I felt at the world, the world that left nothing but words. Words and these gestures of desire and longing and searching crazed madness. I was finally learning to say help, help me, I need help here, can you help? And there was Close to the Knives.

David Wojnarowicz wrote about a “disease in the American landscape,” the literal disease of AIDS, but a crisis caused because the people in power decided who was expendable. Close to the Knives is so intent on exposing the layers of oppression between government and God and family and the “one tribe nation” of “walking Swastikas.” One minute you’re driving through the landscape of light and dark, shadow and memory and space, so much space, and all of a sudden: “I feel that I’m caught in the invisible arms of government in a country slowly dying beyond our grasp.”

We were queer freaks and incest survivors and anarchists, feminists and whores and vegans and sluts and activists taking all these words into our ears our arms our mouths. We exchanged manifestos and zines, books, and fliers and gossip, organized direct actions and art projects, got in dramatic fights over politics, over the weather, over clothing, over who was sleeping with whom; we held each other, we painted each other’s nails and broke down, honey we broke down.

I carried Close to the Knives around like a litmus test; when I met someone new, I’d hand it off—some would turn to me and say, “Oh, this is too much, I can’t handle it.” Others would look me in the eyes with recognition, and those were the ones. Close to the Knives helped me to embrace my rage like a “blood-filled egg,” a shift in the texture of breathing, a way to further opportunities for connection rather than just the isolation we knew so well.

Close to the Knives conjured this world of bathrooms and parks and alleys and rotting piers and other public opportunities for sexual splendor, and I, like David, was “gasping from a sense of loss and desire.” Sure, “I was afraid the intensity of my fantasies would become strangely audible,” but I knew that this public engagement with the sexual could infuse all moments of hope and horror, escape and claustrophobia, landscape and longing, death and remembrance.

I carried Close to the Knives around in my bag for years and sometimes when anything or everything was too much, I would reach for the familial texture of these words: I was learning and living and giving the potential of embracing outsider status in order to create safety, love, community, desire, home on my own terms. David Wojnarowicz reinforced this drive to build my own systems for understanding and challenging the world, my own sense of morality. He knew that “Hell is a place on earth. Heaven is a place in your head.” Queerness became “a wedge that I might successfully drive between me and a world that was rapidly becoming more and more insane.” A wedge I still hold on to.

Via: here


Reading stuff like this reminds me of why it's really important to hear about what inspired those who inspire us.
And is really important in helping the blood pump furiously to my heart and brain
And how importnat it is that truths are shared
And the importance of community / network(s) / media(s) for us to do this within and with

Monday, 14 September 2009

getting a craft on

Since the dawning of September has seen my social life crash and burn :( I shall mostly be spending my Autumn working through these 25 tutorials on how to make books & notebooks by hand.

Sunday, 13 September 2009

like another part of me

I was asked a little while ago to contribute to a zine to accompany the Seripop exhibition at The Baltic centre for contemporary art in Newcastle. This weekend was the first chance I've had to sit down and read the whole zine in full.

I'm not just saying this because he's a friend, but the piece that Michal William (of l o c a l k i d) wrote for the zine made my eyes fill with emotion. He's a bit special, for sure.
Here's part of what he writes:

When we book a tour, or hold a show, or greet each other in the street, or boil water, or take a souvenir snapshot, we control the space - our space - by means of COLLECTIVE and ORGANISATION and CARE. And when we speak of 'LOVE', these are the words we are trying to say. And the actions we make are: 'I will look out for you'.'I will treat you like another part of me', 'and when we meet, we will embrace with looks of companions and comrades'

I've been thinking a lot about 'community' recently, and how a lot of what purports to be community falls waaay short and in truth isn't community at all. But also, I've recently felt what Michal speaks of, and it's something I want to feel 24/7, comrades.

Friday, 11 September 2009

this is home

If home is where the heart is, where is yours? A visual exploration of the concept of 'home,' across continents, oceans and neighborhoods.



Here are your semifinalists! And now it's time to cast your vote — you have until Sunday 13 September to do so.

Viewers will vote on their favorite piece, and finalists will receive their design in a limited edition postcard pack.

re/group leeds




RE/GROUP

A collection of work by Frances Bickerdike, Anna Peaker, Laura Robinson and Jessica Thomas.

At Leeds City Library Gallery, running the whole of September.

Private View on Monday 14th, 6 - 8pm


http://www.annapeaker.co.uk/

Wednesday, 9 September 2009

getting emails like this one turns me on

From my inbox...


Let's start this season with a gay bang. The Stage is Set.


R e e n a S p a u l i n g s F i n e A r t is thrilled to announce....

K8 HARDY, artist
"to all the g#$%!s I've loved before"
OPENING SUNDAY SEPTEMBER 13TH, 6-8PM
(party to follow)
Reena Spaulings 165 East Broadway NY NY 10002


SHOW: September 13th - October 11th, 2009; Thursday through Sunday, Noon to 6pm
reenaspaulings.com



On May 27th 2009 I wrote the following exciting press release:
Attention: (!!!!!_)

Reena Spaulings Fine Art

I don’t appreciate anyone trying to control my expressions and I will not let any gallery control what goes into a show of my art. I AM TAKING BACK TOTAL CONTROL! I don’t care if it won’t be any good. My work is fucking good! It’s not some minimalist anti-aesthetic don’t care about the world conceptual project, ok? It’s messy and I DON’T NEED YOU TO TAKE OVER THE PRODUCTION! I don’t want my hand taken out of my own fucking art show in order to take it “to the next level”. I am completely against that patriarchal view of success. I don’t care if my shit is unprofessional or tacky. I’ve been making art since before I ever walked into a gallery and been involved in crazier shit (LTTR) than this gallery.

ANYWAYS, All the guys my age are on their stupid Nintendo 9th show and I haven’t had one- so I got a lot of shit to show, ok? In fact I hope my shit show is really fucking bad and embarrassing for everyone in this super cool art scene. I want this to be the same as I had ten years ago in my dyke punk rock house: I’ve got something to say.

DO I HAVE ANY COLLECTORS ANYWAYS? Well you know that answer is NO. well why, why, why, I wonder why? So please just help me out this summer so this downwardly mobile “celesbian” can have her first show.

CRITIQUE THIS DADDY FUCKERS!


But before that I wrote...


“Re-working In the In-Between, Shaking It Out.”


The Process is Power conference caught my attention because it addresses two important issues for me:

Process as a foreign/other language inside one dominant language; frequently spoken by Lesbians but not limited to this Tribe; most often used outside of Patriarchal circles.

Process as a metaphor for working used most often in relation to Artists.


These are topics I am currently investigating in my new work, “Notes on Lying”.

What motivates me? I am an artist and an outsider, both simultaneously and distinctively, so a total of 3.



I studied various fruits in my education, each one sliced or deconstructed an/other way, an endless amount of variations- but not quite infinity. Yet, when confronted with “Process” I tend to let it go. As I release this grip, or hailing, there creates a void, torn open through rejection. This void is an open space, never able to be filled or closed, that which is not one. And so I stand empty-handed before myself, and before my reader. But I’m convinced this situation needn’t remain so. I think if we stretch the limits, we might find some wonderful tools for regarding Process.



In a theoretical world, there are as many ways to view a situation as there are ways of viewers. For this reason, I will use simply my own, sketch it briefly and then illustrate some results. I don’t pretend to present any ground-breaking or revolutionary ideas in this text, just to shift my point of view, and possibly yours.



Fluidity, fragmentation, and pleasure are associated with the metaphorical ground breaking. The nascent intellectual current is conceptualism, a modality that creates a structure with hierarchies, it’s symbols and signs. It gives process a rigorous, “one, two” and then falls to the floor. So it’s not what I’m looking at, it’s not the finality, but the backwards unfolding. When I say backwards, I do invoke a form of linearity, but don’t limit it within actual directions.



The focus on “Process” by which meaning has been achieved inherently reveals feminist concerns. Inherently you may ask why? Inheritance is a patriarchal mode of moving power that distinctly and forthrightly excludes women, when I use the word woman now, just briefly to make my point, it is to classify that which is outside heteronormative patterns. Here I assert that again, my concern is not much with what has been said or made or produced. I postulate a different strategy, a risk, for the inscription of Process.



If to speak is to act and I say perform, perhaps performance is a form of lying? That’s philosophy. But it’s hard to answer if you consistently question what is Real.



Objects are less important than process. Process will never earn a dollar. As related in point #2, the (O)ther Tribes, have a whole foreign language of process. Communication and dialogue create friction, a small warmness. Lying is done with language, writing, and also the space between words. Gaping holes of nothing, caverns of emptiness, the liminality of abject unknown. A preferred space to occupy, like a country. Let us not forget power.



I don’t always want to be an artist. Part of it to me is about carrying around a heavy load of ideas and an intense drive to write about them. By writing I mean making art. By writing, I like to imply the gesture of my hand so may I also call it painting? Is it controlled? Is it messy? Is it queer as a two-dollar bill?



Politics are intrinsic here, activating questions and thoughts in the world we live in today; all wars considered. It’s a load of dirty clothes for most in the United States. However, I wear dirty clothes every day. Cleaning, putting away the mess, taking the visibility out of mess, making mess invisible, belongs to the privileged. Visibility now marches into the room, on the paper.



I think of my basic gesture as the American middle finger flying in the air of defiance. We’re supposed to be rebels anyways. I will name the specificity of my stance. Two able bodied legs supported by the ground in the United States of America, foreign soil.



So who owns what and why? Who claims to own the unknown thing that dares not bare its name? If one had to live in a closet, lying out of necessity, does the closet ever leave the room?



Persona is a reaction to Patriarchy. As everyone searches for their true self, they use the fake one they have been given, or fail miserably at that effort. Authenticity is slippery. Mimicry is the tenet of femininity.



It’s easy to obsess over the little things, scrape off the top layer of eye shadow your sister’s friend gave you from her stash of samplers at the department store where they both work. She’s a make up artist. It’s another kind of great artist. I look at the scraped up dirty little pads of packed powder and wonder if the germs from all the rich ladies, because it is a nice department store, I wonder if they could seep all the way to the bottom, totally saturate the rectangle of color. No matter, I’ll let my immune system work it out.



It’s so rude when an acquaintance maybe friend says, “I’m going out with my girlfriends tonight, me and my girlfriend, I just love all my girlfriends, and I really need to have girlfriends.” The gendered friendships keep slapping me on the face with their hallowed placement. Now every time I here a sex signifier I become suspect. I feel like there must be something conservative lurking around it. And these days you can guarantee if something is called a Women’s group, it’s usually for conservative means.



It’s scary how activist terms can get co-opted to the point of innocuous. Yet still I am part separatist and have no problem with making statements about Men. Oh Power. No problem at all. Bold statements regarding the still dominant sex, but oh how those women dream that’s behind us. It’s oh so embarrassing for straight people. Ha ha ha. Must we really bring that up? Let’s just party and have a good time. tickle tickle he he. Me and my girlfriends are liberated.



Stereotypes can’t contain the people within them. It’s violent. So take me on my own terms, or lay yours out so that I can see them. Take a position. I’m wary of silent terms, unspoken, invisible ground.



I’m still not fitting in. I’m a collision. You know what I mean?



Should we decide what to do together? I’m stuck in a pattern. I want to continue. I want clarity. The emotions are muddled. I have a deep commitment. I have conceptual questions. I want to check out.



It’s time to look over all my notes and find some more meaning. I need to keep adding meaning, searching. I make no apologies. I want everything to be clear to myself, not to you.



And coffee. Why does it have to be so bad for you? Is it? Everything is bad. All the artists are sober tea drinkers eating lots of greens and staying in shape. No more drugs, we run our studios like a tight little business ship. You can’t be a mess if you want to succeed!



I’m flipping pages. I’m looking at old super 8 movies. Animals I filmed at the zoo, incessantly walking back and forth, pacing in the cage, back and forth and back and forth in black and white. It’s kinda hard to watch. I think about Guantanamo. I think about this upcoming election and I get freaked out. The elephants are out of focus. The footage from France with the topless girls on the beach makes you want to question your participation in perversity, that’s the United States at work in your mind.



My jeans are dirty. The special black jeans from Trash & Vaudeville where the punks have been making the same cut of jeans since the real deal. The ass has ripped so many times, just came back from the tailor at the dry cleaners, and I feel like I am walking around with a diaper on. It’s weird but my ass still looks good in them. I wish I could afford new clothes. Some avant-garde designer with the freakiest weird shit, who knows if they even sell it to stores even.



I still believe in the male gaze. Seems like everyone has given up on that.



Different ideas. I’d like to dress up as each of my friends and take their portrait, a portrait of me, an homage. Maybe I’ll do it but I wonder if it’s worth it.



The underwear were merely a symbol for the body. The location of the most disgusting form of abjection. I chose the underwear for the location. I buy used underwear. Everyone says they don’t do it. I mean, I check the crotch and make sure it’s not stained, and only if they are like really cool or interesting. And of course I wash them before I wear them. A friend lost my favorite pair of crotch-less panties while performing in the Miss L.E.S. Pageant. Can’t blame her for that. I got them from a Saver’s in Springfield. Now used crotch-less panties no worries. They were low-cut, black lace, from the 70s.



I like to carry around my twenty-something half finished notebooks and journals. I want to finish them because I don’t want to waste the paper. I wish I was an eco-terrorist, but I try to get close. So I try to carry around them with me wherever I go if it is a significant amount of time. I have little ones and regular too. At a certain point a journal will become so time specific that I can’t possibly add to it. Then I will tear out the unused pages and recycle them, making lists and notes and whatnot. I’m so jealous of those hyper organized people. They probably keep their lists in their journals and never fall behind deadlines.



The fancy ones are nice. I can’t afford them all the time, but then who cares. If they get too precious yr fucked because the pages’ value combat the value of your words. You see someone with those pristine perfect notebooks, perhaps in black leather? You wonder, what kind of ideas are going into that special notebook? Probably ones that are continuing to make that person richer. I digress, but details like that are always on my mind. I’m not jealous, just aware. Details, like I was saying. Signifiers as others properly note.



I look cute today and I would like to go somewhere and be appreciated for it. Guess I’d like to go thrift shopping or somewhere public or something in a cruising zone but my money is so tight I can’t even afford that, much less the cab I would need home. I suppose most people could resolve that problem on the Internet, a blog or whatever. I need immediacy, human contact, and human feelings. I need to feel desired.



I’m really pushing it now in a total new over the edge way. Credit cards are maxed out, no more savings. It’s weird to identify with what the politicians are saying, like hey that’s me. No Health insurance, no nothing, broke. hahaha. Borrowed some cash from a friend. Never done that before. Big fucking sigh. I’m freaking out about food but I still continue to look glamorous and that is so confusing. No not the looking part, that’s confusing to other people, it’s the notoriety. I’m not supposed to complain about that. It’s just alienating when you’re broke. And I’m an elitist, and educated, total cultural elitist.



Downwardly mobile they used to say and still some may say about me. It doesn’t stick though anymore. My generation can’t expect to do better than their parents, like our parents could. So there is a downward shift and then slap on being an artist, slap on fighting to be an artist, and downward the finances go. Maybe I’m just in shock cuz I was raised middle class.



Isn’t that so embarrassing for some people? Yet they don’t know what it’s like to have nothing to lose. I wonder how much my not boring life is worth. It sure is fetishized. Glamour. Is that what it costs? It feels like poetic vindication to all the boring straight people out perhaps. They’ve got the Internet, TV, and magazines but not the people.



Is that mean? I really don’t want to sound mean but then I’m afraid I couldn’t write anything down at all.



I’d like to just walk around and let my tits accidentally fall out of my shirt, or hang out. I’m an exhibitionist so it gets me off. Ask an old crotch and she still may say it’s an offense against women. I’d like to offend men and women simultaneously.



I’d like to do a performance with an amp so I could get so loud. I have so many fucking ideas like an idiot high school boy with a boner and a guitar.



Timing again. It’s weird when someone gives you flowers. Every time my dad fucked up or made me mad I would get flowers. It’s like the offense of making your girl cry, not an apology. Flowers make it all better. I like getting flowers now. Maybe it’s the city or the person sending them has better taste than carnations. Really it’s the luxury and color and gesture. Is that killing the earth?



I like to spray myself with perfume before I go to bed. Roll in it. Especially the ones I don’t wear out anymore, like CK1. I was 16 going to gay clubs in Dallas by myself. It was hot. That smell permeated the whole fucking club and that whole time period. You couldn’t turn around without smelling it. I would bring an apple to the Village Station, the three story-12 room mega dance floor gay club, and dance for hours on end. I was exhilarated. Just dancing, no drinks. The thrill of gay movement and being on a floor without being ogled or mauled by men was beyond any free space I had ever known. It was mostly men there. A separate room and bar, of course, for the drag queen shows. I was transfixed, the only white girl with bleach blonde hair in the corner. Often then I was the only white girl and I really enjoyed that.



I feel subservient to the politically righteous conceptual artists of my peers. They frame themselves in such a safe way, who could argue? If you did, if you dare to disagree, then you disagree with the politics. Sometimes I feel like that is what is put on the line, challenge me and my feminist work and that means you are ignorant and patriarchal. And I don’t know what they risked. I guess I want that. I want to feel a little passion. I want to put up a high school art show. I’m not a minimalist. I want to make a mobile, can’t decide out of what.

“I pledge allegiance to shit” is what my Born Against t-shirt said in high school. A soldier saluting a coffin. I got sent home one day for wearing it. Maybe I can find it on eBay. I almost got up to do just that as I wrote it.



I’m horny but I don’t feel like doing anything about it. It’s the end of my period. My flower pharmacy panties are ragged out. I have a thing for pharmacy panties. Especially if I am in a foreign country. I want to touch the average woman. In Austria they had thongs at the pharmacy, could you imagine? Here they call the condom section family planning. We have a language problem in this country.



It barely gets hot up here and that makes me homesick, though by now I don’t know if home could be used properly in that world. I guess there is a forever argument regarding that one and formative years.



I’m probably too old by mainstream standards to walk around with my ass hanging out of my pants like this, but I guess that’s the beauty of it. I keep having to battle my personality aka performance against my work. It’s like S says about how people decide to take things seriously or not. By now I’m not going out of my way to suntan in order to keep my skin looking nice. I’m concerned about wrinkles.



I have deep dream fantasies of places to call home. Houses on the beach left with the past inhabitants possessions including a closet of vintage clothes. Every one of these places unfolds and becomes an endless maze of undiscovered bedrooms and closets. Our parents all expected us to do better than they themselves, only this time the American dream didn’t work that way. None of us expect to do better, doing as in money having. Although we all hope for it. It leaves us in this hole of expectation without work. Not that I can compare myself too much, if I did have the same values, I would be doing “better” most likely.



So here I AM an artist and what do I have to hold on to?



Some respond RIGHT ON SISTER, I am feeling you.

Others are confused think, she’s asking me to look at her and look away at the same time. I feel compelled to look. Another says FUCK YOU TOO.

Jessica: tiny, lucky genius.

Seriously, 'http://tiny.abstractdynamics.org' i.e. tinyluckygenius aka the Unicorn's Tear is my favourite blog right now. I LOVE the way Jessica thinks.

This, from a recent post, rings many bells for me; my life, my purpose, my productions & creativity...

'It's been a long summer of being disconnected from writing. Writing with actual thought about it, writing that isn't about my work, my writing, my book. My life, I know, for a while, maybe an extended while, will be the care and feeding of the thing I made. To wrest away from that feels nessecary and strange. I have barely read, barely taken in, mostly just presented and talked and arranged and hustled. I am home, a little broke, medium tired, missing the entire part of the summer that is the part where you vacate and do nothing. Where you read. Look at stuff and hatch plans that are not terribly ambitious. Like "makin' a pie" or strip mining the massive pile in yr room known as "Clothes Mountain"'.

Tuesday, 8 September 2009

future fuck all - submissions wanted

from my inbox...


Future Fuck All

"Hello friends, I am putting out a call for writing, art, comics, photographs, on the practicial and philosophical aspects of gender, sexuality, bodies, and queerness. Personal experiences (good, bad, and other), philosophies, rants, funny stories, observations, interviews, dreams of the future. Ultimately, I want to put a zine out that is a positive fuck yeah for queerness, transgenderisms, bodies, sexualityies, and ultra wave inclusive feminism. A recognition that all oppressions are interconnected, and the time is now to share our stories and deconstruct the dead ends.

Years ago I did four issues of a crudely similar zine call "Girl-Boy" with a co-editor. It was a fun and enlightening exploration, I want to do it again, this time with everybody!

After the submissions have been picked and assembled I will submit the final zine to an awesome independent publisher. I might also put it on a blog thing for the world to share. If you want to specify rights reserved in your works, write that on the work, or let me know in some way. This is not a profit venture, it is to share experience and open minds, our own, and anyone that reads.

If you have suggestions for a title, please send them in! My original brainstorm title idea "Beyond Girl-Boy" seems entirely cheesy. My new working title is" "Future Fuck All."

Deadline is November 1, 2009.

Drop me a note if you have questions." - Robert, robotearl(at)gmail.com, robnoxious.wordpress.com

x x x

Plus, also...

Nowhere 2 Be Found Magazine

is a fanzine that focses on diverse views & culture from a queer perspective. We're looking for gear heads, geeks, dorks, sci-fi/horror fans, punks, metalheads, those dealing with health, mental health, & substance abuse, doing project...to tell their stories, share their art, poetry, fiction/non-fiction, advice, how to, sites, project, events, etc. Send all submissions to nowheretwobefound(at)gmail.com. You can find more info on YouTube, Facebook, Twitter, or MySpace.

oh, so rad

EveryBody!: Visual resistance in feminist health movements, 1969-2009 from September 11-October 10, 2009 at I Space Gallery, Chicago

Monday, 7 September 2009

rubber ring - seeking suggestions

From my inbox...

Hello,

I need some assistance with a design/illustration project I’m doing.

The project is called:
Rubber Ring: A zine of artful words as a life raft for adolescence. {The title is named after a song by The Smiths about remembering the music and the words that helped you in your youth once you’re grown and ‘laughing and dancing and finally living’}

Basically I’m creating a small self-published magazine that uses the song lyrics of music that is related to various themes such as:

Love / Sex / Death / Beauty / Fear / Alienation / Work / Fashion&Adornments / Bodily Changes&Illness
Anger / Violence / Difference / Creativity / Friendship / Inequality

What I hope to say with this is that in the world there are all of these things, and they exist simultaneously, and despite feeling it no one is alone in fearing isolation and inadequacy. That we are often manipulated and misinformed and that we have value and power and creativity. With these little pocket sized publications I intend to provide something that will do what music often does, offer comfort, recognition and inspiration; but visually. I will be illustrating and designing these words appropriately and including other things such as poems / stories / information / etc. to bolster the rich visuals and link them within a wider context. Basically harnessing popular culture and interpreting it in ways that might reassure someone when in the midst of that most tragicomic of times. I want to mix a blend of humour, mundanity and drama. I want to encourage and challenge, infusing it with the best kind of feminist humanity.

You can help me by:
* Recommending songs that you think are appropriate to one or more of the above themes. OR
* Recommending songs that you think are appropriate to one or more of the above themes that you loved when you were at that age. And a brief description of why that particular song is appropriate, was it helpful / inspiring etc? OR
* Do both of the above and tell me any anecdotes you have about things that were important to you then, embarrassing moments, love, fashion faux pas, fears, sexual encounters. Whatever you feel comfortable sharing with me really that you think might help someone going through something difficult. I won’t use any real names in the zine nor will I share the information about anyone’s identity with anyone else, not a soul.

Contact: jo_eliza_beth@hotmail.com

a small, potentailly setimental post about friends and community

I just got back. I've been in New York, working. I got two nights off, the only time off for the whole trip. I knew I had to spend it wisely. It was then I realised how lucky I am to have such an extended family of friends over the world; friends that have been gained through my projects and by keeping in touch with people who pass through my city. I'd been told about a gig happening in New York, co-incidently on one of my nights off...
7:30 Dibs, 8:00 Dan Fishback, 8:30 Susie Asado, 9:30 Andrew Phillip Tipton, 10:00 Nan Turner, 10:30 Horror Me, 11:00 Kat Burns, 11:30 Toby Goodshank, 12:00 Sibsi

I got to the Sidewalk Cafe and it felt like falling into the arms of the best hug ever. Nan had told me of the show, and it was *so* good to see her, both personally, and to see her solo set - now complete with rapping!! And oh, Dan... we have shared friends, and immediately after his set I knew I wanted to be his best friend, I fell head over heels. And Lisa came down to the show to say hi, and I met Yoko for the first time, years after interviewing her. And I bumped into folks that I've worked on shows with in the UK like Toby, Phoebe, and Matt. And it felt so wonderful to be alone in a strange city and wandering out into the night to this venue full of friends and love and community.
And not just for how they personally welcomed me that night, coming forward with hugs and smiles, but also the knowledge of how crazily talented they are. The awareness of this crazy-talented set of people interacting and performing and creating this music and art in such a supportive environment, in this creative community. It just felt so electric that these people who found each other in the wilds of new york and have come to work together as such a dynamic community - supporting each other, putting on shows and events, listening and collaborating. From an outsiders perspective I felt a pang of jealousy and knowledge that I don't really have that friendship community available to me 24/7. Yet so happy to be there, and feeling included and participating to the buzz of something important.

The sense of community I felt was different yet totally the same to that that I felt in San Francisco only a few short weeks before; that feeling of acceptance and love and shared worlds, and excitement and creativity, and small degrees of separation and the knowledge of how small the world can be, the sense of potential, the warmth, the wanting to forge a better sense of community in my day-to-day not just on these off-chances.
I know the greatest people. I need to stop forgetting that, cuz these connections and friends I have are just so ridiculously positive and inspiring.